Tuesday, May 06, 2008
I know I should talk to you in person. I've got all the good reasons, but no guts to tell it. You'll think that I am such a coward kiddo, hiding behind her mom's back. Maybe you're right, 'coz you know, I admit it, I'm afraid, so afraid that my uncontrollable mouth might hurt or can make you feel disrespected. I don't want it to happen. I mean it. But, my feelings are strong enough to be withdrawn, and the most gentle way to express these is through this letter.
I just want to quit the job i am in right now. why? first and foremost I am not interested in ICTs or microelectronics. my background on these topics is limited. oh well, got an introductory course in computer science, but that's not enough. you know it does not.
I can feel the overflowing urge of leaving. I don't wanna be confined here forever. I know I can't be a productive person here coz whenever I ride jeepney-MRT-jeepney-jeepney just to get here as early as 7 AM, it's like an agony. Living within the four walls of the room, facing the computer for eight hours or so, doing nothing, or maybe doing something that I never like after all, it's a never-ending experience of depression and suffering. And whenever i recognize this place and the thought that I'm still here, I really wanted to scream my lungs out and immediately get outta here. I know this is not the perfect place for me. I need improvement and discover greater heights in the field that interests me, definitely not here.
I know this is partly my fault because I had a choice. well, I admit it, wrong choice. wrong move.
But honestly, I want to thank you for this shit. Somehow it opened my eyes to see the reality: what I really want to do with my life. And yeah, when I quit and leave, I will begin to take a few steps to fulfilling my dreams.
If you need clarifications, I am just here inside the box you created.
Sincerely,
Ecca
